I was on my way home from a friends at 2 AM and stopped at a red light in a quiet empty town. There were no cars anywhere in sight so I said what the hell, I'm gonna run this red light. About halfway through, I noticed a car pulling up to the intersection behind me. Just as I was wondering what the chances were that it could be a cop, flashing lights lit up my rear view mirror. Hello points on my license.
I was having a bad day and all I wanted in the world was some Pop Tarts from the vending machine outside my office. I put my money in and the Pop Tarts got stuck. Without even thinking I punched the glass so hard that it shattered right in front of me. I was just standing there with my mouth open, frozen in disbelief. I grabbed the Pop Tarts and ran inside.
Right before an important management meeting at work, I realized I really had to piss. On my way to the meeting I ran into a bathroom and up to the urinal. Right before I unbuckled my belt, the door opened and my boss walked up to urinal next to me. He started the uncomfortable urinal small talk which for some reason made it psychologically impossible for me to pee. The break in conversation made it completely obvious that I was standing there in silence, and I had no choice but to pretend like I had finished ahead of him. To make matters worse, he walked with me directly to the meeting, preventing me from going to another bathroom, and I had to sit through the meeting with my legs crossed the entire time.
My girlfriend lives in Philadelphia and I live in Nashville, so we only get to spend "quality time" together about once a month. We decided to rent a villa up on the Poconos for a romantic weekend for Valentines Day. When we returned from dinner we noticed that it was pretty chilly in the house. After further evaluating the situation, we determined that the heat was broken. Awesome. So, we spent the next 2 nights freezing in sub 40 degree weather, facing death in these frozen conditions. Also, my girlfriend suffered from being extremely unsatisfied, thanks to my inability to "perform" under these adverse conditions.
My wife doesn't smoke, a vegetarian, works out, eats well, doesn't drink yet just had DCIS and surgery...twice :(
I brought a pretty girl back to my college dorm one time and we started making out on my bed. About ten minutes into it, I noticed something felt a little strange. I pulled away and was terrified to see her face covered in my blood. Apparently my nose bleeds when I get excited. I am still scarred to this day.
I had a contracting company and an architect I did business with before begged me to do the job. I had to have all my guys join the union, had to pay union wages. He got behind in payments. Stuck me for $60,000 and forced me to declare bankruptcy while he did the same thing to another company for $350,000. He basically walked away with his whole building remolded for FREE by screwing people. I dont know if you call that unlucky.
I bought a Win-For-Life scratch off once, and immediately scratched off two 'LIFE' symbols. It was pretty exciting, so I forced myself not to scratch off the remaining four slots for a while, to keep my hopes up through a boring work week. I convinced myself to scratch off one space per morning. By the fifth day, I had LIFE, LIFE, $100, $10, $100. I finally gave in and scratched the last symbol and....nothing. Literally nothing, like the printer ran out of ink and just stopped printing in that square. I eventually drove to a convenience store and complained and the clerk said he could look it up by its serial number. So he did, and it was a loser.
I was on my way to work like any other day, and a few miles before my office building the low tire pressure gauge lit up on my dashboard. So I looked down at it and took my eyes off the road for a few seconds, and during that time I hit a massive pot hole in the street. My front tire nearly exploded, and when I went to get it replaced it wasn't even the same tire that was low on air.